


The Dude Cave

by samwhambam



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: M/M, Slight spoilers, Well - Freeform, spoilers for s6e11, the boys have a do over of their bachelor party, the dude cave makes an appearance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:22:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23194675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samwhambam/pseuds/samwhambam
Summary: Patrick and David decide to redo a part of their bachelor party, just the two of them.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 32
Kudos: 231





	The Dude Cave

**Author's Note:**

> I had thoughts about tonight's episode and felt the need to write something. 
> 
> Please enjoy this little coda and for the love of everything good, wash your hands, don't touch your face and stay the fuck inside if you can.

“ _ Before we find ourselves ebrious with hooch and happiness, may I say how very proud all of us are on this day of days. Your father with his pecuniary savvy and trepidation has turned what began as a katzenjammer of a day into one filled with faith, hope, and love.” _

David was gobsmacked. He wasn’t surprised, no. Once he learned about the itinerary, he had expected everything that had unfolded throughout the day, to happen. He expected his family members to drag their feet through the events, but he hadn’t expected  _ that.  _

He was happy for his dad and Stevie, he truly was. But, he just wanted one day, one day where he was the center of attention. His thoughts were spiraling, his heart was beating faster and faster and all the air was slowly being sucked out of his lungs as he clicked his glass against everyone’s drinks. The alcohol was hot in his throat. Stevie was saying something about shots but he just wanted to go home. Back to Patrick’s apartment. With the food trays. 

There was a warm hand on his back and he turned into it immediately. He would recognize the broad palm and stubby fingers  _ anywhere.  _ Even though they didn’t have a ring on them yet. 

“I think we need refills,” Patrick said. David raised an eyebrow at him. His drink was heavy on his fingers. He looked at Patrick’s beer. Even in the shitty light of the bar, he could tell it was still full. 

“Do we?” David asked, but then he was being led back to the bar. 

“I think we do,” Patrick murmured as he pushed David down onto one of the bar stools. David put his drink down on the bar, but Patrick quickly picked it up and pressed it back into David’s hand.

David was confused, but then Patrick held up his beer. 

“I’d like to make a toast,” Patrick started. David wanted to roll his eyes and bite back a smile, but he knew what Patrick was doing and he was there with him. “To the love of my life. You taught me what it meant to love someone. I am truly lucky to be able to spend the rest of my life with you.”

David bit his lip and tilted his head back. He was  _ not  _ going to cry. Not in this bar, so close to his family. 

“I love you,” David breathed. Patrick clicked his bottle with David’s glass, but before Patrick could take a drink, David pulled it from his hand and placed it on the bartop with his glass.

He ran his fingertips over Patrick’s jaw, so softly, before he hooked his fingers behind his neck. 

“I think it’s bad luck if we don’t drink after a toast,” Patrick whispered, his lips half a second from crashing into David’s. 

David sighed into the kiss. Patrick had this shining ability to make everything  _ okay  _ and David got to  _ marry  _ him. 

What a life he was living. 

When Patrick pulled away, there was a blush spreading over the tips of Patrick’s cheeks. 

_ Beautiful.  _

“Let’s rejoin the party,” Patrick whispered, his hands were warm on the top of David’s thighs. “There’s a table full of party foods and I know that we both love it.”

David laughed as he shook his head. “One more minute.”

First, he needed to kiss his fiance again. And then another time. And maybe one more. 

In the end, it was Stevie who dragged them from the bar back to the party. 

*

“Hey David,” Patrick said as he came up behind David. 

David turned to him and leaned back against the counter. They still had a few more things to do before inventory was officially done and they could enjoy the rest of their Friday night. Which included pizza, wine and the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice. David had already decided on that. 

“I have an idea for tomorrow night,” Patrick said as he leaned next to David. 

“I’m listening,” David murmured as he turned to face Patrick, who just hooked his fingers into David’s waistband and pulled him closer. 

“I was thinking it could be fun to redo part of our bachelor party,” Patrick explained. His hands slid along David’s waist until they were laced behind David’s back. 

“Oh,” David shook his head. “We don’t, we don’t have to do that.”

Patrick tilted a smile at him. 

“We don’t have to, but I want to,” Patrick’s voice was low and warm and David wanted to crawl into it and live there forever. 

He wanted to do it for Patrick, but he couldn’t endure another mortifying moment with his family. 

“I don’t think I’m up for spending more time with my family. In that capacity,” David explained. It just, it wasn’t great and David could make better memories elsewhere. 

“Not with them,” Patrick soothed. “Just the two of us.”

“Oh,” David breathed out. That, David would do in a heartbeat. “Okay.”

“We can go for drinks,” Patrick teased. He pressed a soft kiss to David’s lips. He didn’t go far, just nuzzled his nose against David’s. “Then go for some late night entertainment.”

“Oh,” David leaned back, trusting Patrick’s capable hands to hold him up as he drummed his fingers against Patrick’s shoulders. “What late night entertainment?”

“You’ll see,” Patrick pulled him closer until they were back to being flush with each other. “I figured we should just lean into the gaudy bachelor party. Really go the full nine yards.”

David raised his eyebrow at him. 

“Sorry for the sports metaphor,” Patrick whispered before he kissed him again. 

*

“Oh my god,” David asked as the car slowed to a stop. Patrick ignored him, choosing to get out of the Uber instead. David let him open the door for him. 

“Is this okay?” Patrick asked as he took David’s hand. 

“Normally? No,” David shook his head with a smile.

“But as a cliche bachelor party?” Patrick asked for clarification. 

“Then it works,” David said. 

They stood in the parking lot, eyes fixed on the neon sign above the entrance to the bar. 

_ The Dude Cave  _

“I called ahead,” Patrick explained as he pulled on David’s hand. “They have lots of appetizers and they can make polar bear shots and they’ll break larger bills into ones.”

“Oh,” David pulled Patrick into a stop so he could kiss him. He had to. He had to show Patrick how perfect that plan was. 

“Good plan?” Patrick whispered against David’s lips. 

“Yeah,” David breathed back. It was a perfect plan. Just him, Patrick, copious amounts of alcohol and appetizers. 

David followed him through the entrance of the  _ cave  _ and into the flashing lights, sweat and testosterone. 

*

David was  _ drunk _ . He was drunk off of polar bear shots and full of appetizers that Patrick had fed him. He had ones in one hand and was gripping Patrick’s arm with the other as a scantily clad  _ fireman  _ strutted onto the stage. 

“This is everything,” David screeched as Patrick threw his head back in a laugh. 

Patrick was also drunk and David loved him so,  _ so  _ much. 

“It’s ridiculous,” Patrick laughed back, but he tucked a couple of dollars into the waistband of the man’s shorts. 

David held out his own bills and shimmied his shoulders as the dancer took the money for him. When he walked away, David shifted in his seat until he was draped over Patrick’s shoulders. 

“You know,” David said, his lips moving against Patrick’s ear. “You’d look really great in that outfit.”

Patrick shook his head with a laugh and David was so in love. 

“Maybe I’ll get something fun for the wedding night,” Patrick responded. He laced his fingers with David and David couldn’t help but press a kiss to Patrick’s temple. 

_ So, so in love.  _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> again--wash your hands. 20 seconds. the happy birthday song twice. don't touch your face. sneeze and cough into your elbow and if you're sick, stay home. let's take care of ourselves so we can take care of others. 
> 
> if you're in an area where you're shelter in place, i'm right there with you and feel free to find me on tumblr and talk to me. help me entertain you if you need it. 
> 
> come find me on tumblr [as samwhambam](https://samwhambam.tumblr.com/).


End file.
